Dancing Like My Mother

I get home around 8.30, slightly buzzed from my drink with Ringmaster at Amber after work. Everyone is sitting around.
Pony and Boyf are watching Homecoming Warrior on the Disney channel. It's almost as good as Halloweentown.
While Wendy Wu's teachers are posessed by the spirits of monks from her past so they can train her to save the world
I decide on Grey tight Sevens, tapered at Cable Car Tailors, a white undertank, an orange woven art teacher churchlady
vest in XXL, multiple strands of silver and goldish necklaces.
I curl my lashes, mascara and dig the last of my eyegloss out of the corners of the jar.
Agent puts on blush and liner and the eyelashes I got him for christmas, but the spirit gum doesn't stick the fake mustache on too good so he leaves it stuck to the medicine cabinet.
Boyf is in and out smoking cigarettes on the steps, I use the downstairs mirror to fix my hair.
I find 15dollars in my jeans, so we are taking a cab to the club.
On the way Agent and I discuss global warming, apathy among our peers, and my deifinite investment in material things, and shallow pursuits.

At AC's it's already full. Like FULL and it's only 11. Not the best night to not do the door.
Lucy gives me a hug from her stool by the front door, large tan and brown iced cupcakes on a platter in next to her.

The twins come up one with flowers.
I'm touched, no really, it's my first gift. Flowers. I suspect they may have been plucked from a pre-existing bouquet and neatly arranged in some plain paper. But it's the thought.

I tell Dad it's my birthday, and he grabs the back of my head to pull me over the bar for a cheek kiss. I heart Dad, he's the greatest. For a moment I realize that he may actually want to sleep with me, that jokes about me being his son might actually be sexualish in nature.
I order a Jameson neat.

I catch Jewelry from the corner of my eye. I can't believe she's here and Mattie's here too. It's so sweet to see work folks at birthday celebrations.
Mattie's all
"What are you drinking?"
I'm all
I just got this Jameson
and I spill some Jameson on his lap.
"Do you want Yaeger?"
I'll have a Frenet if I have to have something.
We convice Jewelry that it's like Yaeger but it's herbal, and good for your stomach, because she has a stomach ache.

Genivive Gay and Coffin come in. They're all bleary eyed
"Hungover" Coffin says.
Genivive is wearing a christmas sweater with Panda's, queer because christmas has definitely passed and it may be the only ironic thing I've ever seen her wear, it goes against her usual uniform of black tank and brown Levi twill pants.

I see Pony and Texas. I'm all
Welcome back Tex,
then
Oh but I saw you on New Year's
and he says at the same time
I saw you on New Year's
almost at the same time, so it's a little off, and not funny but awkward. He's wearing a ripped up white lace (think Frederick's of Holywood) tank over a misfits t-shirt.
I'm all
I like your vest
he's all
"I like your vest"
I'm all
It's XXL

I make my way back to Rchrd OH?!
He hugs and kisses me.
Vanderbuilt spins by and wraps her arms around my waist and squeezes.
It's a tight quick and kind hug.

Alice comes up to me with a tiny little box.
Gift two.
It's a tiny horsehead pin
"I got it on a horseback riding website for myself. But I figured you'd love it more. Do you think coolness of Horses has made them into a tacky or last season animal?"
I'm all
I've loved horses for a while I don't care if they are played out now.

I put the box in my back pocket, then decide to pin the pin to my shirt under the vest and toss the box so that I don't have a box shaped sillouetted rear end.

Cupcake is all
"Did you have a cupcake yet?"
No
On my way to the cupcakes Agent hands me half a cupcake
"I can't finish this it's too sweet"
The cupcake has a peanut buttery texture and the icing tastes very peanut buttery.
Cupcake is all
"I don't really like peanut butter but I like these. I think I did a good job with the icing."
You did.

I go for another Jameson and squeeze Gay's leg on the way by.
Teeny shows up with Shy in tow. I don't recognize him at first.
His hair has been cut off and his bangs are pointed up in one direction in the front and he has on thick glasses and a white t-shirt. I half expect stone washed denim rolled up to reveal 14 hole dock martins with a spare flannel tied around his waist. He looks 90's dykey. Not bad, but dykey. He changes all the time. The look brings out his handsomeness.

I grab Teeny for a dance on the floor, we pass by Brandicorn chatting up Texas.
We talk about the politics of dancing, and bad business deals.
She looks great as always.
I catch myself in the mirror, dancing, and mess up my hair.

I run to the restroom again.
Then back to the bar just as Fashion comes in. He has two friends in tow.
I spot him a few minutes before he gets to me, so I talk to Jewelry for a minute.

He's all
"I like your vest"
I'm all
It's XXXL.
Cupcakes is all
"Who makes it?"
Marc Jacobs
Fashion is like
"No this is Marc Jacobs" and turns up his coat collar.
Cupcake turns out my collar
"It's made by Troody and Julian"
I'm all
It's my craft hobby crusie wear. Look there's wooden buttons, they don't work.
I'm all
Are you working? Where's your camera?
Fashion pats his pocket takes out the camera and point it at me.
I pull an ugly face.
Usually a crowd pleaser but Fashion wants something goodlooking.
I'm all
I don't photograph well
He's all
"You always look cute and I've seen good photos of you"
We try a few times but I can't hold it together.

Boyf squeezes past in a rush making it awkward when I try to introduce him to Fashion.
Sparkle squeezes by in a bluish t with a scarf tied in a stiff little bow around his neck.
He's all
"Happy Birthday"
I'm all
How did you tie that?
He's all
"I just tied it"
It looks great
"Thanks."

I dance. I dance with Struthers. I'm so glad she came, she hops around the dance floor. It's crowded with all the newbies but I swing my arms around and make some room.
I switch up partners alot, I have to, it's my birthday.
I dance with Coco.
I'm all
We're family now! BigStereo family.
She's all
"What?"
I'm all
WE ARE FAMILY NOW
She's wearing many necklaces with many large red and blue plastic bits on them. Too cute for words, and she's a good dancer. Out of my league, but I don't think she notices yet.

Nasty is about. She's taking so many pics. My head spins. I pull some really ugly faces for her.

Rchrd OH?! plays Christine by Siouxsie and the Banshees.
It is my birthday song and hard to transition to from the mostly dancey stuff, but everyone keeps on and Struthers is all
"I LOVE this song"

The lights come on.
Slings is here.
I walk up to her and she moves to walk right by me, maybe she didn't see who I was, so I'm all
SLINGS
and she's like
HI
like she was going to say it all along. Totally weird.
It's my Birthday.
"Happy Birthday"

I grab glasses and bottles and put them on the bar for Dad who grabs me one more time for a kiss on the cheek.

Outside everyone mills about. But it's cold so I hail a cab real quick for me and Agent and Boyf and Pony.
Agent gets a text from Angel, at our urging he texts back something dirty. He's moving. He's got nothing to lose.

It's classical music and I'm all
Do you actually like classical music or is that for us?
to the cabbie.
I'm actually curious, not just an asshole.
He likes it, but not just this other stuff too.

After Pony gets out I remember I won't see him for a week because he's going to Kansas or Idaho or something.

At home I eat some string cheese, disrobe and fall into bed.


(For pics of hotness check out www.streetfancy.blogspot.com)

Labels: birthday, Hold Yr Horses, Rchrd Oh

Posted by Johnny at 11:18 PM | Permalink | Comments

I wake up at 12pm.
In the living room I clear out some detritus from last nights THC overload.
The Ugly Betty marathon is cycling through again so I rewatch the Holiday Photo Shoot For Mode Magazine episode again.
And the Halloween episode. That guy that likes Betty at her job is way cooler than her loser boyfriend.
Carson comes down with a fresh face and headache.
I look for tylenol, or advil and find yellow and red pills in an unmarked bottle.
It's suspicious.

Red shows up for Boyf, she wants to cut his hair, he's passed out.
She leaves.
Boyf stumbles downstairs in a vintage pink t-shirt with penguins on it, and brown trousers with a blue pinstripe, cut off at the bottom.

Weed is smoked.
Carson's friend Phish comes over. She has a Phish tote bag and super grey ringed eyes, and beautiful hair that looks almost wiglike in the way it's perched on her head.

Agent and me and Carson and Phish go for brunch at 4pm, JJ is there, he's a waitor and he hooks us up.
Agent's caramel milkshake is totally gnarly. So sweet and thick.
I get plain turkey.

Boyf calls, he says he found a good party, it's at D's house.

It's so cold outside. And overcast. I'm glad this year is ending with its cold and its overcastness.
We walk home.
Boyf got a hair cut and it looks rounder.
They start smoking pot and buy some pot to make cookies.
I take a few tequila shots and then Agent buys some champagne, we swig and swill it.

Pony shows up. He runs down his list of engagements for the evening:
Juanita More
Tiger Beat party
Carson calls Maggie, turns out she's going to the same party. It's on 22nd.
At 10 put on my tuxedo printed shirt and black jeans and suspenders. Brown knee high socks and fancy black shoes.
Carson puts on a vintage remake of a forties teal dress, back combs her hair, and paints on some glamygold glitter
under each eye.
I curl lashes, apply mascara, and a pat of pink powder under my eye.
Boyf puts on a vintagey creamy green cardigan with black detailing, a black polo shirt and brown boots,
I tell him to roll up his denim just a little more.
I'm all
I think those boots make your outfit really Mission Hipster
He's all
"I don't care as long as it looks good"
Boyf packs up his cookies, peanut butter and fudge. I taste, just to taste, and they are amazing. Really peanut buttery.
I take a few more shots of tequila and we head out.
Agent's going to the Haight.
It's not that cold. On 22nd we see people outside and apartment.
As we get closer it becomes clear that this is a QUEER party. It's pretty dykey.
Right when we walk up so does Maggie. She's got on a vintage dress, tall heels, and a tall bouffant. She's totally giving severe 50's housewife.
We climb the steep stairs and settle in a brightly lit hallway.
Boyf and Carson are totally stoned.
The hallway is awkward. I half recognize several people who walk by.
This is so awkward. The bright light, despite the tequila I'm not drunk enough.
I look at my phone. It's 11:50.
I'm all
Hey everyone it's 11:50 We have ten minutes
I yell it up and down the hall.
No one seems to notice.

Astrid shows up and we head to the kitchen to look for liquer. There isn't any, and it's so hot because there's a heater in the hall right outside the kitchen.
We go back to the hallway.
People are dancing in a darkened living room where a dj is set up.
D walks by and I'm all smiles and happy handshakes. He's all
"We're going to my room, it's in the back"
Um. Ok.

It's 11:55 and I'm all
Hey everyone we have five minutes. Just five minutes till the new year.
Still nothing.

Boyf brought pocket liquer, me and Astrid shoot some vodka.
She ate a pot cookie but it didn't hit yet.
I look at my phone and it's midnight and several seconds.
I'm all
IT'S MIDNIGHT. HAAPPEEE NEW YEARS. HAAPPEEE NEW YEARS.
Some folks whoop, most don't say anything.
AWKWARD.

Astrid and I climb back down the stairs and head to mission street for liquer.
We pass The Bar on mission. There are crowds on the streets.
I buy tequila and Astrid gets Tecate.
She takes a picture of me taking my first sip of the new year.
I take one of her.
We deem 2007 "ALOCHOL ADVENTURE"
At the party Boyf and Carson have come outside. We sit on a curb and they smoke and eat more cookies.
We notice that the music coming from the party is the same set that we just heard at midnight.

I get a call from Cupcake. Him and Alice, Vanderbuilt, Rchrd Oh?!, Sleezey, and Quake are just a few blocks away, and they're walking up to 16th for a party.

I rush off to meet them leaving Boyf, and Carson on the front steps.
I have trouble finding the bar they're at then I spot Rchrd Oh?! riding away on his scooter.
I sneak up on Cupcake and hug him from behind.
Alice is with him. We catch up to Vanderbuilt and Sleezey. He's wearing a carboard gold New Year's hat.
We hoof it to the party.
Rchrd Oh?! calls and says to say we are with him when we get there.
I'm all
If we have to pay the cover I'm going home. I am so broke.
I swig from my flask.
At the party Vanderbuilt and me squeeze by the front door just behind Sleezey, because he's dj-ing.
I get the feeling that he doesn't like me.
But I'm paranoid drunk.
I go to the bathroom with Vanderbuilt and Alice, we gossip in a stall. About our friends.
I get paranoid again, anyone could be listening.
We have an ILOVEYOUGUYSSOGLADIKNOWYOUTHISYEARHASBEENGREAT moment.
In the hall way I see Rchrd Oh?! going upstairs with Quake and Sleezey. I follow
Rchrd Oh?! introduces me to Quake.
They are looking for smoking on the roof.
The building is mostly empty, it feels like being in a school after it closes.
I'm designing bandannas for Quake's band so we chat it up and he gets me a drink.
I dance to a song or two and bounce.
I have to get to my neighbor's after party.
It's gotten colder, and my peacoat, though goodlooking is not protecting against the New Year chill.

Astrid is on the couch. In the time that I went to 16th street and walked home she managed to
go to the Knock Out and left.
There is a bong being lit.
I gather the forces and we head next door.
Corncob is asleep when we get there, and not many people are there.
We sit in the upstairs office most of the time.
Different lesbians come and go, say hello and goodbye.
I go home, because I can't sit here anymore.
Agent has a party in his room. I chat it up with his friend that is starting at the salon on Weds.
I gossip with him. I say too much. The tequila working magic on me.
Boyf and Carson come back but I go to bed. I can't stay awake any longer.
I think it is 5am. I think.
Falling asleep I start to take inventory of the past year and outline some hopes for the future but the room spins
and I pass out.

Posted by Johnny at 2:53 PM | Permalink | Comments